Sep
2
I saw the baby doctor today. I intend to see the baby doctor two more times. The third time I see her, I will also see my daughter.
“If you don’t go into labor first,” the doctor said.
I made a fake scared face.
“You know,” she laughed, “about once a year, I have a patient with a history of c-sections go into labor and end up with a fast vaginal delivery.”
And then I made a real scared face. I’m about as ready for a vaginal delivery as I was for a c-section my first go round, which means NOT AT ALL. I’m okay with the c-section, now. After a respectable depression from failing at natural child birth with Julia and a blissful c-section delivery with Lucy, I came to terms with my surgical destiny and it’s a place I don’t mind living. This is why I’m fully convinced I’ll go into labor and give birth to Phoebe in the car on the side of the road next to a cow field in Amish Country.
This is me with three weeks to go.
She’s coming early, I just know it. She’s got nowhere else to go. I don’t think I can get any bigger.
I was shocked to discover I’d gained next to no weight since my last visit. The belly tape measure said I’d grown inches, though.
“It’s all that amniotic fluid,” the doctor growled when we couldn’t get Phoebe’s heartbeat on the monitor. We could see her kicking and rolling around under my skin, but even when we finally heard her heartbeat, it was so faint and muffled – going at a perfect rate, but far, far away, buried beneath amniotic fluid that I feel might burst out of my belly button at any moment.
I’m like the not-Veruca Salt girl in Willy Wonka. You know, the blueberry girl that they had to roll down to the juicing room. I don’t want to be juiced, though. I’d prefer a surgical procedure.
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19 Cool Kids Commented
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You look absolutely beautiful. Really. Truly.
Your grow babies well my friend! You look beautiful!!
You really are all baby. I’m sure that you are absolutely miserable, but I don’t think that I have ever seen you look so gorgeous. You are truely glowing : )
You are almost there!
Best wishes on your third – been there, done that. The toddler years are now back upon me and I’d forgotten how crazy and hectic it is!
You look great! Good luck, Les.
(Her name was Violet. “Violet! You’re turning violet, Violet!”)
You look amazing too. I’m excited.
You look gorgeous!
You really do look magnificient!
I’m so excited for you!
You look fantastic! I am getting so excited for you 5!!
Pregnancy is beautiful and being a mom is even more. I love your article and you look great on that picture. Don’t worry about the weight, it will soon be back.
Great story. I’m new to your blog and also just perused your “skill set” on the About page. Very funny. You must be ridiculously good at seductive air guitar
Hello there! You look beautiful! I am hoping that you remember me. I sort of fell of the blogging planet. I recently have been trying to jump back in and I had to look you up. I remember when Bella was about to have her first baby sister! I hope that you and your family are well, your buckeyes still have that special ingredient, and that I get to catch up with your blogging a little bit!
I am so sorry, I typed Bella and not Julia. I am such a doof. Sorry about that. It’s been a long day and I need to get to bed
You look positively radiant!
Good luck, by whatever way it happens.
You look great! Can’t wait to see photos of Phoebe
Good luck with the delivery – it will be over before you know it! The girls will be so excited to meet her!
Hi Leslie!
I know I’ve been a stranger and missed your whole pregnancy just about..SO happy to be back for the tail end and back to blogging again. What a treat to see how beautiful you are and what a blessing. Congrats on Phoebe and adding to that lovely family of yours. We just unpacked some boxes (because we’re always unpacking boxes) and came across your sock monkeys! It made me smile and was a slight reminder that I need to check in over at “My Mommy’s Place”. Glad I did. And it’s true, you are ALL BABY! You look amazing.
You look so great! Take care!