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 When Leslie put the word out that she was looking for contributions to her "This Is Motherhood" feature on her blog, I jumped at the chance to write for the month of May. This is the mother of all months for me, as a Mother. I am, above all else, my children's Mother and I have wanted to be someones Mommy, Momma, Mom and Mother since I was five and I told all the neighbors that my Mom had had another baby. And she was giving it to me to take care of. I brought her out to show everyone, I carefully peeled back the tattered aqua blue receiving blanket (that sometimes also doubled as my long hair when I clipped it on my head) to reveal my new baby sister. Which of course, was just one of those vinyl dolls who's eyes closed when you laid her down. She smelled funny and probably leeched something cancerous from her vinyl body parts.
In 1987, I finally became a Mom to a real live baby. May 6th 1987. I spent *my* first Mother's day on the maternity floor of the hospital learning to nurse my preemie baby. Who, can I just share a funny story? was, by the technologically advanced sonograms of 1987 declared a baby girl. Katrina Rebecca was due to make her arrival on June 8th, 1987. Instead, I got what I wanted all along, a beautiful baby boy, although 4 weeks early, blue as a smurf with absolutely no clothes to wear home that weren't pink, peach and purple. But I WAS a Mom!! Then, exactly 6 years and 364 days later, on May 5th 1994 I gave birth to a full term little boy who had scrawny legs, a gentle spirit and dark blue eyes. I was a Mommy again. A Queen among men and I spent that Mother's day at home caring for my two lovely boys. I'm sure I'm no different than every other Mom with momnesia. Those first days have blurred into memories of nuzzling a newborn's head, the euphoria of breastfeeding successfully and tearing up at the sight of my first born bonding with his brother. A bond I was sure would never be broken. I have no memory of sleepless nights, engorged breasts and endless crying jags, not to mention the crying of the new baby.
Fast forward 7 more years, through a divorce, a move, a new job and whole lotta changes including a new marriage, to October of 2001. I am a Mommy for the third time. To a boy who, by blood levels and advanced level 2 ultrasound equipment was determined to be a miscarriage. A boy who fooled all the doubters, including me, who hung in there with all the bullheadedness he is blessed with to this day, and was born full term and completely normal. For the third time, to a third boy, I am a Mom again.
So you see, this month? Really is the Mother of all months for me. Particularly THIS May as we celebrate my first born turning 21 and my last born saying good-bye to the last remaining shred of his babyhood as he graduates from kindergarten and prepares to enters first grade in the fall. I hesitate to mention my middle boy turning 14 because well, 14 year olds are not the stuff of posts designed to fondly recall all that is wonderful and fulfilling about motherhood. Fourteen year olds are, let's just say a challenge. But each of my boys is experiencing something great, something memorable and all of it in the same month. A momentous month, indeed. There will be caps and gowns and tears and photo opportunities and tears and sunglasses to hide the flow of those tears. I've heard a rumor that the one turning 21 will be indoctrinated into manhood with a night out, a legal drink (or three) and even a visit to a strip club. It's a bit of a leap for me to imagine my preemie baby leering at boobs and butts when it seems just recently I was changing his butt and feeding him with my boobs. Yeah, that's weird.
May brings many things, including spring turning toward summer, the end of the school year, a boy becoming a man and a baby becoming a boy. And a holiday dedicated to all Mothers. I hope your Mother's day is filled with reminders of what a fantastic and important job you are doing raising responsible, loving, caring citizens.
About the author: Pam Nash is a 43 year old
business owner and stay at home mom to a 20 year old son, a 13
year old son and a 5 1/2 year old son. She lives in
suburbtopia with her sexy, wickedly funny and all around devoted
and fantastic second husband. You can read more about
their lives at her personal blog
Bubbles Writes.
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